I had a meltdown

Okay mamas, I want to hear your thoughts…

When my boys were little I had such a hard time watching them grow. Birthdays were a celebration but also mixed with some sadness because MY BABIES AREN’T BABIES anymore! Was I doing enough fun activities with them? Were we making memories? Was I too grumpy? Losing my temper too often? I desperately wanted to be a good mom and I wanted them to have a wonderful childhood.

Now they’re grown and I look back on my younger self with more compassion. Being a mom is imperfect. I did some things really well and I made a lot of mistakes. Sometimes I was so focused on David’s needs that Matthias’s needs got pushed aside. Sometimes my body would tell me to rest and I would keep pushing–and have a meltdown because I was so exhausted. Sometimes while the business was growing, I prioritized work over family time. I can see the ways I failed and forgive myself. I can admit motherhood is imperfect, I am imperfect. I can ask my boys to forgive me. There was a lot of good and we hold onto that.

Looking back I see how the little things we loved were how we built family memories–pizza and family movie nights, chocolate chip pancakes, trivia questions at the dinner table. I didn’t have to stress about building family memories–it happened naturally (especially when I wasn’t stressed ha!)

The boys are grown and I don’t miss the days of having small children like I expected. I cherish those days and I cherish these days and I look to the future with hope and full of love. My ‘Full of Love Necklace’ represents the love we pour out on family {and friends}.

So mama, I would love to hear your thoughts. If you’re in the littles stage, is it hard to watch them grow? Do you worry about making memories? Mamas with grown kids, do you miss the days when they were little? ♥️

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