Lisa Leonard Designs

the journey is painful

August 5th | older posts

but there is so much joy.

Yesterday I felt sad. Nothing brought this on. I woke up feeling ‘heavy’. I didn’t feel blue or blah. I felt ‘lump in your throat’ sad. So after I put the boys down for a nap, I laid down and had a good cry. I cried because many of the dreams we had for David will never be realized and because there are children who aren’t loved like they should be and because this world is a painful place. It felt good. It felt good to remember and FEEL how painful this journey is. And everyday I am amazed to find so much joy.

12 Responses

  1. The 6 Pucks says:

    a good cry is always a great way to work through it…i hope your feeling better, and know that all your sharing of your feelings and thoughts, help many. and touch many lives, even the people who really don’t know you. you have helped me today! thanks!

  2. Rays Family says:

    I so understand!

  3. Sarah Markley says:

    I love your heart, Lis.

  4. Lisa Leonard says:

    kate, the party was so fun–a good distractor! i loved being with all you girls and celebrating jen & gracie. thanks for your sweet post.

  5. Natalie* says:

    i know what you mean, from my own perspective, of course. one of my favorite quotes is from isak dinesen – “the cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears or the sea” – glad to hear your cry helped – mine always help me.

  6. Kristen Borland says:

    crying is so therapeutic! i know what you mean about how some times it’s so good to just feel.

  7. Missy Grant says:

    Loving you, Lisa. I am so thankful the good Lord gave us tears! I too like the fact that we can just feel….sorry you had a rough start to your day.


  8. Karen says:

    Life is indeed painful…and I know what you mean about the sadness. And the joy.

  9. Kelly says:

    Days and crys like that clense the soul! They are needed!

  10. Rebecca says:

    I got so used to doing the right thing and taking care of everything and keeping a good attitude that I forgot how necessary it is to just feel the pain and sadness sometimes. It’s ok to stop saying that you are blessed because it could be worse (and yes, it could be but still, your are allowed to feel disappointment and pain and sadness for the bad things, even if they aren’t as bad as they could be). It’s ok to just feel all of those things and cry or scream or rant and rave. Of course, then you have to go back to dealing with the issues and finding solutions and keeping a good attitude. :-) But you still own those other emotions. This has been such a hard lesson for me.

  11. carrymesouth says:

    Lisa, Nichole Nordeman has a song that I love and I think you would like it too, the name of the song is *Brave* she said she wrote it about her son and his first steps and attempts. She is a Christian artist.

  12. erika says:

    This breaks my heart. I’m sorry times can be so painful… boy I have been there.. and many times it can be pretty unexpected.

    I hope you know me well enough to know that I am NOT AT ALL trying to diminish your pain when I say… (a bit in jest).. that it does occur to me that you haven’t spent very much time lately with your friend Erika.. This could be a coincidence… but I’m not sure it is wise to take this chance :) Miss you. XOXO

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